Comments on: The Art of Letting Go http://twentyorsomething.com/2009/12/07/the-art-of-letting-go/ tonight we drink to youth. Wed, 28 Jul 2010 02:01:49 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 hourly 1 By: Susan Pogorzelski - admin http://twentyorsomething.com/2009/12/07/the-art-of-letting-go/comment-page-1/#comment-5340 Susan Pogorzelski - admin Wed, 09 Dec 2009 12:03:56 +0000 http://twentyorsomething.com/?p=2510#comment-5340 <b> Akirah: </b> Letting go is the hardest part, especially when it's such a huge part of your life. That's the part I've always had a difficult time reconciling -- how do you move forward with this change, without this person, without this something? It's why my greatest fears have been loss and why I've been so stubborn in my reluctance to let go of the things that matter -- because it always seemed like a loss. I still haven't completely reconciled this, haven't figured it out, but I think I'm beginning to understand that letting go doesn't mean losing anything, it just means a change, being able to move forward. Which isn't always easy, either. I wish I had some words of comfort for you, but I hope you know that you have people in your corner if you ever need them. Wishing you the very best. Akirah: Letting go is the hardest part, especially when it’s such a huge part of your life. That’s the part I’ve always had a difficult time reconciling — how do you move forward with this change, without this person, without this something? It’s why my greatest fears have been loss and why I’ve been so stubborn in my reluctance to let go of the things that matter — because it always seemed like a loss. I still haven’t completely reconciled this, haven’t figured it out, but I think I’m beginning to understand that letting go doesn’t mean losing anything, it just means a change, being able to move forward. Which isn’t always easy, either.

I wish I had some words of comfort for you, but I hope you know that you have people in your corner if you ever need them. Wishing you the very best.

]]> By: Susan Pogorzelski - admin http://twentyorsomething.com/2009/12/07/the-art-of-letting-go/comment-page-1/#comment-5339 Susan Pogorzelski - admin Wed, 09 Dec 2009 12:00:06 +0000 http://twentyorsomething.com/?p=2510#comment-5339 <b>Beth:</b> I've always admired people who work in non-profit organizations because of what you describe -- you give so much of yourselves, asking little in return. I think in this instance especially, learning to let go of those emotions that you experience is not only necessary, but crucial -- part of the taking care of yourself. I'm beginning to understand that there's a difference between turning off those emotions and not holding them in. It's something I experienced awhile back at a temp job, but didn't really understand then. Seems there's more than one lesson in letting go I've yet to learn ;) I appreciate your insight, Beth! Beth: I’ve always admired people who work in non-profit organizations because of what you describe — you give so much of yourselves, asking little in return. I think in this instance especially, learning to let go of those emotions that you experience is not only necessary, but crucial — part of the taking care of yourself. I’m beginning to understand that there’s a difference between turning off those emotions and not holding them in. It’s something I experienced awhile back at a temp job, but didn’t really understand then. Seems there’s more than one lesson in letting go I’ve yet to learn ;) I appreciate your insight, Beth!

]]> By: Susan Pogorzelski - admin http://twentyorsomething.com/2009/12/07/the-art-of-letting-go/comment-page-1/#comment-5338 Susan Pogorzelski - admin Wed, 09 Dec 2009 11:52:30 +0000 http://twentyorsomething.com/?p=2510#comment-5338 <b> Elisa: </b> Way, way back last November I had someone tell me that I had to let go and let people live their own lives -- for better or for worse. I wanted to eliminate that for worse part of the equation, wanted to see them happy, wanted good things for them. But the fact of the matter is that he was right -- I can't be responsible for them, they have to live their own lives. Just as I have to live mine and you are responsible for yours. That was a surprise to hear, actually -- I didn't realize that I might be hurting them as well as hurting myself the whole time. I wonder if it's a balance to be reached, as Sam says above -- helping others, but letting go enough to let them help themselves, and helping ourselves, but letting up enough to let others help us. Because you're right -- sometimes it's hard to find those people who are willing to be there for you...but sometimes it's hard to admit that you need them, though they've been there the whole time. You brought up a lot of great thoughts, Elisa, that has the wheels turning. Thanks for that, and thanks for your comment! Elisa: Way, way back last November I had someone tell me that I had to let go and let people live their own lives — for better or for worse. I wanted to eliminate that for worse part of the equation, wanted to see them happy, wanted good things for them. But the fact of the matter is that he was right — I can’t be responsible for them, they have to live their own lives. Just as I have to live mine and you are responsible for yours. That was a surprise to hear, actually — I didn’t realize that I might be hurting them as well as hurting myself the whole time.

I wonder if it’s a balance to be reached, as Sam says above — helping others, but letting go enough to let them help themselves, and helping ourselves, but letting up enough to let others help us. Because you’re right — sometimes it’s hard to find those people who are willing to be there for you…but sometimes it’s hard to admit that you need them, though they’ve been there the whole time.

You brought up a lot of great thoughts, Elisa, that has the wheels turning. Thanks for that, and thanks for your comment!

]]> By: Susan Pogorzelski - admin http://twentyorsomething.com/2009/12/07/the-art-of-letting-go/comment-page-1/#comment-5337 Susan Pogorzelski - admin Wed, 09 Dec 2009 11:48:11 +0000 http://twentyorsomething.com/?p=2510#comment-5337 <b> Sam: </b> It's definitely a work in progress, but little by little, I think I'm realizing that you can't help others unless you help yourself first, and that might mean doing what's best for you first...that might mean letting go. That part is never easy, but maybe it's the only way to move forward. I'm so glad that we're on this similar journey together, learning and able to help each other along! Thanks for everything. :) <b> Dani: </b> Letting go IS hard and one of the things I've always struggled with. We may not like it, but maybe it's what's necessary. Thanks for the comment! Sam: It’s definitely a work in progress, but little by little, I think I’m realizing that you can’t help others unless you help yourself first, and that might mean doing what’s best for you first…that might mean letting go. That part is never easy, but maybe it’s the only way to move forward. I’m so glad that we’re on this similar journey together, learning and able to help each other along! Thanks for everything. :)

Dani: Letting go IS hard and one of the things I’ve always struggled with. We may not like it, but maybe it’s what’s necessary. Thanks for the comment!

]]> By: Akirah http://twentyorsomething.com/2009/12/07/the-art-of-letting-go/comment-page-1/#comment-5335 Akirah Tue, 08 Dec 2009 22:43:38 +0000 http://twentyorsomething.com/?p=2510#comment-5335 This is perfect for me as I'm learning to let go of a person who has been important to me for the past three years. Indeed, sometimes you do have to let go. This is perfect for me as I’m learning to let go of a person who has been important to me for the past three years. Indeed, sometimes you do have to let go.

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