Comments on: I Still Believe In Love

By: Akirah

Akirah — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 20:00:29 +0000

Aww. This gave me chills. I love love. And I’m glad you still believe in it. I know you’ll find someone great…and that person will encourage you to be better than you already are…if that’s even possible! I met my love while dancing at a club. Never thought those things happen, but it can.

Anything can happen!

By: Susan Pogorzelski - admin

Susan Pogorzelski - admin — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 11:12:53 +0000

Elisa: That’s exactly what I was saying, in some way. That it’s unpredictable, that you never, ever know when someone will come into your life and change it up for the better. And it probably won’t be in the span of one hour and eighty minutes.

I’ve seen that with the friends I’ve met, the family who have come back around, and I’m sure it will be the same with love. As I wrote to Harl above, I agree that no one can make you feel complete (other than yourself), but I do believe that people can help you grow and become a better person.

I have a whole lot more to say on the subject in light of your own recent post and will take those comments your way this evening. Thanks, Elisa — I love your input, as always.

By: Susan Pogorzelski - admin

Susan Pogorzelski - admin — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 11:05:59 +0000

Dani: I think everyone who has essentially “lost themselves” needs to read “The Missing Piece,” I love that Harl brought it up! If only we all would smell flowers and watch butterflies and paint rainbows. Too sugary? Maybe. But I like my cup of life that way Thanks for commenting!

By: Susan Pogorzelski - admin

Susan Pogorzelski - admin — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 11:04:23 +0000

Harl: I love your comment and appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts and insight. Truthfully, I love the idea of finding someone who helps me to grow, challenges me, who loves my inconsistencies, who loves me as is. It’s being able to grow, be better and not to remain stagnant, that is important. I don’t want a perfect love — I’m not sure that exists — but I do want someone with whom I can communicate and share a part of ourselves and connect, spend time with. A few weeks ago, I was writing a draft post about being independent and how much I enjoyed that, how I wasn’t even sure I wanted to be in a relationship. I had just started to learn to like myself, love myself again this past year, after all, so could I even function in a relationship?

I completely agree that you have to love you, that no one can do that for you, and that love (and life) isn’t perfect and calculated. Truly, that wasn’t what I meant to express here. Rather, that it’s pretty unpredictable, that you never know, but that something incredibly profound still exists. And that maybe I’m capable of it.

I love Shel Silverstein book — I actually saw it in a bookstore in college and bought it for myself as a reminder. What you say there is so true as well — I like to think that I know myself well enough that if I ever stop smelling the flowers and pausing to watch the butterflies again, then that’s the moment when I lose myself again.

That finding myself is still a journey I’m on — I don’t think there’s ever a point where it’s finished, but I still do hope that there are those with whom I can share that journey.

Thanks for this comment, Harl — a bit of realism was what I needed to hear (though I may be stubborn in my thinking!). Always a friend.

By: Elisa

Elisa — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 03:09:29 +0000

That’s distressingly heartbreaking that an average couple only spends an hour or two talking to each other a week. HEARTBREAKING!

We all have these pre-conceived notions of how “it’s” supposed to happen. It’s supposed to be like a scene out of a movie or a sitcom or something like that but that’s never how it actually plays out. For me, I fully anticipate someone falling for me because I am such a dork that it’s endearing. I’ll probably trip over/fall down/do something else klutzy that will cinch it.

I think I kinda understand what you are saying…and I agree so much. Every way that we THINK it’s supposed to happen it probably won’t. But the great part is that even though the movie ending seems great on paper (well…on screen I guess!) the REAL thing will be 300% more because it will be better than we ever could have imagined.

In the meantime, dating and flirting and whatnot is definitely fun, but why put all of yourself into something that isn’t worth it. No one would ask you to do that with your career/living situation/etc. Why do we expect it in relationships?