Personal Development

Sometimes Goodbye Is A Second Chance

Please don’t cry one tear for me,
I’m not afraid
Of what I have to say.
This is my one and only voice
So listen close,
It’s only for today…
Sometimes goodbye is a second chance.

Shinedown, “Second Chance”

open doors by criggchef (flickr)

I’ve been taught some lessons these last few weeks, lessons for which I know I’ll always be grateful. Consequently, I’ve also learned a lot about myself. I’ve begun to realize my own strength, my ability to keep moving forward, pushing through difficult situations and my own sensitivity.

I’ve learned that while other people make me happy, my happiness doesn’t have to depend on that, on them. I’ve learned, and am still learning, not to let things hold me back out of fear, based on previous experiences, because every day is a new opportunity, a new chance for something better, something greater. I’ve learned to hold onto the things I care about, the ones that I know are worthwhile, to not be afraid to see where that will take me; still, I’ve learned not to hold on too tightly, to let go and recognize when the time has come to move on.

And I’ve learned, or at least am finally really beginning to learn, how to accept change.

You hear the phrase “when one door closes, another door opens” whenever opportunity passes by. I think it’s meant to comfort, but I never really understood it. What if you’re not ready for another door to open? What if you still long to go through that same door, the one that was closed? What if that door closed unexpectedly, without warning? And what if there’s still some shred of possibility, visible light beneath the crack, voices, life, on the other side?

I wonder if there are different doors for every opportunity, every possibility, every choice. I wonder if life is about learning how to navigate those doors — to decide to accept that it’s been shut and move on or to keep knocking, hoping someone will hear you, will answer.

Maybe some opportunities come with solid oak doors — the heavy ones with bolts, the ones you know need to stay closed, locked forever. You may hesitate at these, but you know there won’t be an answer even if you knocked. And you know that’s for the best.

You know you need to move on.

But then maybe there are other doors…Maybe there are doors without a lock, without a key. Maybe these doors are left open for a reason, and all you have to do is find the courage to reach out and test that doorknob, have the strength to raise your hand and knock harder.

Or maybe these doors really are new ones, with the same facade as the old. Although they are familiar, although they look the same as other doors that you’ve come across, maybe they’re a little bit different, a little bit changed. Maybe this is a chance to try again with a different outcome.

A chance to find something better.

I wonder if life really is about opening and closing all these doors and deciding which ones to walk through.

Maybe what you’ll find is that you’re welcomed.

Or maybe you’ll find that it’s finally time to move on.

Either way, maybe it’s up to you to decide which door is which, and maybe, too, that’s part of the risk, part of the excitement.

Some doors need to remain shut forever; some doors remind you that you need to walk away.

Yet sometimes you need to find your own second chance. Sometimes you need to push open that door, walk over that threshold, and see where it can lead.

2 thoughts on “Sometimes Goodbye Is A Second Chance”

  1. Wow, this is a beautiful post! Through your words, I can see each of the opportunities in my life as one of the doors you describe. I think the analogy is spot on. There are some doors that are meant to remain closed forever, and some that start open and must be closed in time. Deciding which doors to approach and summoning the courage to turn the handle is major, but so is recognizing that not all the doors we confront in our lives are the same. So, props to you for having that insight.

  2. Sam: Thanks so much for your comment and thoughts! I think it’s always hard to figure out which door is which sometimes, and you’re absolutely right — learning to keep knocking or move on takes courage. I hope that we can all find that, hope that all our doors can be easily recognizable. Thanks again, Sam!

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