Comments on: I’m Going Home: Toulouse

By: Shahnaz

Shahnaz — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 11:50:49 +0000

Susan,

It was so much fun missing trains with you. Let’s do it again soon.

Shahnaz -
Ha. No. You’re nuts.

Seriously, though, I do miss you and am so grateful that we were in that part together. I’m sure that your presence is why I was so calm throughout that train ride, so my eternal gratitude for that! I hope that by now you’re safe and sound and happy and where you need to be. Have a very happy holiday; I’ll be keeping in touch, you can count on it! Love, Susan

By: Defygravity84

Defygravity84 — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 13:52:36 +0000

At least Shahnaz didn’t leave you behind at something like a Tube stop.

You’re awesome, I just wanted you to know that.

Sarah – I am absolutely convinced that you losing me/getting lost on the Tube was gearing me up for this journey…I just had to figure out how to find my own way back Oh, and by the way? Ditto. You rock. – Susan

By: Brian

Brian — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 16:59:41 +0000

I have had similar experiences where everything seems to go wrong, you miss a flight or some other problem occurs. But more often than not something good comes from the experience that you can remember and appreciate in the future.

You may not even realise what it is until sometime later when you have had time to reflect about the events in a calmer state of mind.

So I would wait until you are home and then when you feel safe and content, think about what happened and see what comes from it.

Brian – Thanks so much for your comment. Traveling really is stressful isn’t it? But the great thing that I can see now is that I’ve had help all along the way: support from my family back home, great people with whom I’ve connected, even for just a few moments, and I’ve learned to rely on myself and my instincts. The journey had been harrowing, but especially on this trip home, the feeling of empowerment, of self-reliance, was something remarkable. Lessons are always being taught, it seems, and I certainly learned mine. Thanks again and best to you! – Susan

By: Cynthia Morris

Cynthia Morris — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 10:21:12 +0000

Susan,
Thanks for sharing the journey! This is my response:
you got exactly what you needed
you got what you believed you would get. You were dead certain that you were going to miss your flights, and nothing, no positive thinking, was going to talk you out of that. So voila.
The COOL thing is you got this because it showed you so much about yourself. Look at how much you grew in those three weeks. The difference between the crazy trip there and the crazy trip back wasn’t that you were going home – it was that you were stronger and had expanded your capacity for disarray. I think your comfort zone has grown. You can do anything.
I’m so proud of you. I see you learning that life isn’t about all the external circumstances being neat and controlled, but how we deal with them.
We think travel is about going to new places, seeing things, buying postcards and goodies. It’s about expanding our capacity for discomfort.
I had the best trip to Madrid! 13 hours! I wrote, reflected, drew, listened to my TED podcasts, which completely inspired me.
AND!
I missed my train from Barcelona to Madrid, because the Portbou train was 30 minutes late. I went through the same mental machinations that you did. I also did some drawings on the train, using a completely different style – more fast, crazy, unkempt, that reflected my energy. These drawings are awesome and I love them.
I got this missed connection opportunity to learn how to be calm even when I think I need to panic and create drama. I had 30 minutes to catch the next train and was shuttled from window to window to pay for the new ticket. (!!!) I was a madwoman. Now I look back and see I didn’t have to be that way.
So glad you made it and are happy with the pooch and your peeps. Have a great Thanksgiving!

Cynthia,

As per usual, you’re absolutely right. As positive as I was trying to be, inside I had a growing feeling that something was going to happen, that I was going to miss my flights. And as hard as I tried to put that feeling aside, it still remained. And look what that negativity bred!

BUT. I’m so glad that it did. Hindsight is always, always 20/20 — looking back, I never would have learned what I did without these trials. Getting there had been hell, but I learned from it. It seemed that getting back was my test to prove that. And it was a crazy adventure that I can laugh about and share and say Look! Look what I did! It has given way to a pretty cool feeling that I hope I can always remember and hold onto. Your comment is dead-on. The fact that I was going home played a small role — the greater part was in how I viewed the situation, and with that, I’ve felt changed. Incredible.

And I see that crazy travel happens to all of us Glad to read that Panama was a success and that you’re safe and sound in Madrid. And as an added note: you’ve inspired me to take up watercolor painting. You’ve inspired me in so many other ways.

Thanks for everything. Thanks for you. – Susan